


Philophobia

by TheSilvertonguedSlacker



Category: Hololive, HololiveEN, holoMyth
Genre: F/F, Takamori
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:40:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27388846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSilvertonguedSlacker/pseuds/TheSilvertonguedSlacker
Summary: Kiara goes round Cali's for a Phasmophobia collab, and finally has enough of Kiara's shit and calls her bluff."Do it, Kusatori."
Relationships: Mori Calliope/Takanashi Kiara
Comments: 12
Kudos: 406





	Philophobia

**Author's Note:**

> Just to clarify this is of the characters Mori Calliope and Takanashi Kiara, rather than their real-world equivalents, and thus tries to remain grounded in their mythos. So they're effectively just normal, mythical live streamers, however also with the established lore from streams. Just wanted to clarify that at the start so people don't get confused and stuff

Kiara knocked on Calli’s front door rhythmically, bouncing slightly on the balls of her feet. She was awfully proud of herself for smoothly getting the green light on coming over for today's stream, and excited for another day of playfully teasing the woman she loved the most _in person,_ which was the _BEST_ way to tease. The door opened after a few seconds that felt a lot longer in the anxious bird's mind, not just because she was round Calli’s but also because waiting on a doorstep in hell isn’t _really_ the most welcoming feeling. 

  
“‘Sup?” Calli asked in a slightly tired drawl, not as though she had just woken up but rather that, y’know, life just be that way.

  
“CALLIIIIIIIII!” Kiara squealed as she threw her arms around her with glee, nuzzling her face into Calli’s defenseless neck as Calli tried to feebly defend herself (which amounted to little more than saying ‘no, stop it. Stop.’ a couple of times) before Kiara released her and let herself into the porch. 

“Woooow, this place is _nice!”_ Kiara whistled, inviting herself the grand tour whilst Calli closed the door behind her. “It’s very big!”

“Yeah I know right? I like it. Yeah.” Calli agreed, going to the kitchen and pouring herself a glass of her cheapest red and a glass of orange juice for Kiara. 

  
“I think I’ll like living here very much when we’re married!” Kiara giggled from upstairs, causing Calli to choke on her sip. 

  
“Yeah, Sure, well, believe what you want.” She mumbled too soft for Kiara to hear, the contents of the glass masking her true expression. Kiara made her way downstairs, where she noticed that Calli had still in fact not noticed her. She crept slowly forward holding her breath until she was right behind her. 

“I...LOVE YOUUUUU!” Kiara shouted out as her fingers danced across the sides of Calli’s waist, causing her cheeks to flush as she spilled a couple of drops of wine on her top but amazingly kept the majority in her glass.

“GUH, WHAT THE FUCK KUSATORI!” Calli yelped as soon as the wine had finished painfully making its way down her throat.

“Ooo, awfully _jumpy_ today Calli, are you _scared?_ ” Kiara teased, bringing her lips close enough to Calli’s ear that she could feel her breath.

“What? No! Shut up! You’re the chicken!” Calli spat back, her body paralyzed. 

  
“I am NOT a Chicken!” Kiara scoffed indignantly as she flattened her fingers on Calli’s waist. “I am a majestic phoenix, as you know better than anyone.”

The feel of Kiara’s palms on her torso made Calli suddenly very aware of the fact she hadn’t moved from her grip, which she quickly rectified with a quickstep to the front.

“You’re a Kusatori is what you are, jeez” Calli muttered, not noticing how Kiara’s teasing had caused her glass to become mysteriously empty. She poured another one which, once again, seemed to suddenly disappear and thus poured a third. 

“You’re such a _Scaredygami_ Calli! The game isn’t even that bad!” Kiara laughed, pulling herself up onto the countertop and swinging her legs. Calli’s face flushed as she fixed Kiara with an angry, embarrassed glare. 

“Wtf it's terrifying! The way it reacts to what you say and when you’re alone and the lights flicker and...and everything about it is scary as hell!” Calli tried to defend herself but was getting visibly redder with each desperate argument she made. Kiara jumped off the counter with a giggle, enjoying every second of it. 

“Don’t worryyyyy Calli, _I’ll_ protect you.” 

“Yeah sure whatever.” Calli quickly muttered, once again becoming somewhat surprised at the emptiness of her glass. Calli reaped souls for a living. She had lived her entire life around people who ended up in hell because of their ability to be dicks. She was good friends with Stan for crying out loud, but none of them were able to get under Calli’s skin quite like Kusatori, and it frustrated her to no end. 

“Maybe I’m not that scared because I’m haunted anyway.” Kiara mused out loud, the back of her feet making a rhythmic tapping as she swung. 

“Right yeah mmhm.” Calli dismissed, rolling her eyes. Kiara had already had her fun, and Calli refused to get got again. Kiara pushed herself off the counter, stretching her back out and cracking her neck. 

“No really! My new place is haunted, remember? An exterminator came and cleared the place out, and yet at night, well…” Kiara sighed out of sight as Calli focused on the sour, bitter taste of red. “I still hear the _scratching_ against my ceiling. Not only that but...well no, you’ll just think I’m silly.”

“What?” Calli’s voice was slightly quieter than usual.

“Well, last night, I was in bed, and I started hearing this _sound_ , right? And it seemed to be coming from downstairs. And of course, I was sleeping completely _naked_ because it was hot, and I was like ‘Do I _really_ want to go downstairs to check on the spooky noise?’ which the answer was obviously, you know, _no_ , but the noise just kept getting louder and louder and I was genuinely scared that it was the boiler or something! What if it was going to explode! So I got out of bed, still completely naked, and got to the bedroom door when I noticed that the noise had _moved._ So whatever it was was either alive or mobile. What the fuck! I went to open the door but only as I had already opened it did I realize the noise was now RIGHT OUTSIDE the door, and- _KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII_ !” Suddenly Kiara let out a blood-curdling scream as the kitchen light and living room light suddenly shut off, causing Calli’s heart to leap into her chest. She spun around and immediately noticed the lack of one _full_ Kusatori, although there was at least _partial_ Kusatori as her jacket and hat lay on the floor. Calli grabbed the top of the wine bottle and lept into action, barreling through the door with her makeshift club in hand ready to go full gangsta on some ghost bitchass, only to instead be met with a cackling half-naked Kiara rolling on the floor in just her sports bra. 

“Ok what the _fuck_ Kusatori!” Calli spluttered through crimson faced heavy breathing, her bottle still in prime thwacking position. She considered giving Kiara a swift bonk, but considering the economy-sized bottle it might be a little too harsh. 

“Calli, you came for meeeeeeee! I knew you loved me!” Kiara continued to giggle, pointing to the bottle in disbelief. “Were...we’re you about to try and smack the ghost with a wine bottle?” 

“Well yeah no shit I came for you, you’re important to-I’m not gonna let-We’re in HELL, Kusatori. _The Motherfuckin’ afterlife._ If you were hunted by a ghost up top he could totally come here and try and snatch you! I’m not letting some dead a-hole take you from m-my crib! What kinda reaper would that make me!” Calli frantically tried to justify her actions, desperately looking around the room in an attempt to avoid Kiara’s gaze-and Kiara’s...G-gaze. Kiara pulled herself off the floor as Calli unplugged the cork from the bottle, deciding to just forsake the glass entirely. As red-faced as Calli was it would be remiss to say that Kiara was devoid of rouge herself, as Calli’s show of at the very least bravery had genuinely touched her. She half expected Calli to hide or just scream, but seeing her come in battle-ready caused a soft warmth to grow in her chest. 

“Well, it means a lot to me that you would fight ghosts for me,” Kiara whispered softly, bouncing over to Calli. “Now how to reward my Shinigami Kishi? A _kiss,_ perhaps? _Chuuuu?_ ”

Kiara watched Calli with teasing eyes as she continued to glug the rest of the bottle, her thumb and forefinger softly rubbing together behind her back. There was more left of the bottle than Kiara had thought, and the point had _almost_ gotten awkward when Calli’s lips came free with a loud pop. She gave Kiara a disapproving look that was almost a sneer, her cheeks now permanently tinged red. There was an odd vibe about her Kiara didn’t recognize, and she was worried she may have genuinely upset her. 

“Ugh fuck it, sure.” She sighed, throwing the now empty bottle behind her. 

All of Kiara’s functions suddenly stopped working at once. 

“Eh?”

Calli wasn’t sure if it was the whole bottle of wine, the adrenaline pumping through her, the memory of how she dealt with Phasmophobia rising up, Kiara’s state or undress, or simply Kiara’s constant teasing finally breaking through the wall she had worked so hard to maintain, but right now, at this moment, Calli was completely receptive to what Kiara wanted to do. If she wanted a kiss then fuck it, she could have a kiss. Whatever. But instead of leaping on this chance as Calli had expected, Kiara just stood with her eyes wide and mouth agape. 

“What are you waiting for?” Calli pointed to the spot in front of her. “Come on.”

A million different thoughts were going through Kiara’s head right now. Was it a trick? Was she about to somehow get revenge for Kiara scaring her like that? What was Calli’s end goal right now? To be kissed? Did...she actually wanted to be kissed? Of course, Kiara wanted her to want to be kissed but, No way, right? It wouldn’t be that easy, _right?_ In her frantic mind, she didn’t recognize that it was in fact not easy at all to get to this point, and had in fact been a rather long time coming. To her, this was amazingly completely out of nowhere. 

  
“Oh ho ho ho, _reallllllly?_ You _meaaaaan it?_ ” Kiara teetee’d, taking a step closer to Calli whilst moving her hips vivaciously. 

“Yeah fuck it, why not? Lay one on me.” Calli nodded, rolling her shoulders and looking Kiara straight in the eyes. Though her face could win with a 2-7 offset in poker, her heavier breathing was an obvious tell..that Kiara had still not picked up on. 

“Oh well, if you’re being so generous, why don’t we even make out a little?~” Kiara pushed, taking another step closer. What was happening?

  
“Sure, why the hell not. I’ll even use tongue, fuck it.” Calli didn’t even know how the words made it past her lips, but as soon as they did the tinge in her cheeks was certainly no longer alcohol-induced. Hearing such a proposition from Calli, even if it was somehow an elaborate plan, caused Kiara to melt internally. _Seriously, what was happening?_ Kiara took more steps forward reducing their 2 feet apart to mere inches. Neither of them could tell if they could feel the breath of the other on them or if it was the heaviness of their own.

“I’m really going to do it.” Kiara nervously laughed, never expecting to get to this point today, if even ever. 

  
“Then do it. Come on, _do it_.” Calli had begun to become more aggressive, her heart pumping the alcohol through her body at a record pace. 

“I’m gonna do it, I’m gonna kiss you _so. Damn. Hard_.”

“Well stop talkin’ about it and _do it, Kusatori.”_

“Well, I’m going to do it! Right now!”

  
“Okay, DO IT!”

  
“I WILL!”

  
“OKAY, GUH.”

Neither of the two girls moved an inch, stuck in a stalemate. The weight of each second passing on the clock felt like another weighted chain on their legs. 

  
_Tick._

_Tick._

_Tick._

“KISS ME ALREADY, PUSSY.” Calli smacked her chest in a taunt, about to throw hands whilst Kiara was just vibrating. 

  
“Well, why don’t you kiss me!”

“No! fuck you! kiss me!”

_Tick._

  
“...I’m scared!” 

“I don’t give a shit!”

Calli pushed Kiara harder than intended, or maybe it was that Kiara’s footing was already incredibly unsteady, but before they knew what had happened Kiara was flat on her back with Calli on top of her. 

“Oh shit, you okay Kusatori? Fuck that was an accident.”

“No no I’m...I’m fine, I’m...Fine. Haha...haha…”

Both girls were burning hot enough to fry a newbie KFC member. There was absolutely no doubt that what they were feeling right now was each other's breath on their lips and each other's heartbeats against their own. 

This was okay, right? Kiara had more than enough permission at this point. Cali was literally on top of her. There was undoubtedly an infinitesimally small window here for Kiara to get everything she ever wanted and more. 

_“Do it, Kusatori._ ” 

She could see it closing in real-time. All she had to do was close her eyes, think about this fact, and claim it. That was it. That was _it._ She could do this. She was an immortal majestic phoenix about to claim her prey! She could do this! She can! She _will!_

_BZZZZZZT. BZZZZZT. BZZZZZT._

The phone's vibration took them both to a level neither were comfortable with and Calli shot up from the floor, Kiara quickly following her. The flow of time had returned to the room as both girls began laying claim to the air they hadn’t realized they weren't taking in. 

  
“Guh, hello?” Calli spluttered as she pressed the answer button, turning to look at Kiara but quickly turning away again flushed when she saw she was getting her vest back on. 

  
“ _What the hell are you guys doing!?”_ Watson’s voice on the phone was halfway between laughter and panic. 

  
“Huh? Oh shit, uh, sorry! Kiara got scared by a ghost-” Calli winced at her own comment. “Anway we’ll join the stream now, sorry we’re late.”

“ _Oh, you’re not late.”_ Amelia hummed ominously, causing the red hot blood coursing through Calli’s veins to chill instantly. Her eyes shot towards Kiara, whose skin had equally paled. She held out her phone for Cali to see with a shaking hand. For some reason, despite having a phasmophobia thumbnail, Gura’s stream did not have a Phasmophobia title. Rather, in fact, it seemed to have been renamed ‘TAKAMORI WATCH!’. What was odder still, however, was what was beneath it. Calli’s own Phasmophobia stream, with the words ‘LIVE’ right next to it in red. The two girls' eyes simultaneously gravitated towards the webcams blinking red light, where they both stared at it in disbelief. Calli had been getting the stream ready before Kiara arrived but she didn’t-She surely wouldn’t have- _oh._

_Oh no._

_Oh please god no._

“Calli…” Kiara trailed off, absolutely no idea what to say in this situation. Calli dropped the phone in her hand on the floor, Watson’s laughter echoing out of the tinny speaker. 

“I...I swore so much.”

Kiara softly pat Calli’s head. 

  
“ _Guh.”_


End file.
